Subject: ackanomic digest V3 #177
From: [email-masked] (ackanomic digest)
To: [email-masked]

ackanomic digest         Sunday, May 31 1998         Volume 03 : Number 177

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Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 03:45:42 -0400 (EDT)
From: K2 <"kii@kii"@internex.net.au>
Subject: Re: Acka: Stuff

I plant the Amber Banana Seed.

K 2

K2 wrote:

> I retract all offers I have made.
>
> I perform the acid rain dance. It invoves a lot of shaking of the
> extremities followed by repeated aplication of a size 23 wooden mallet to
> the head.
>
> K 2
>
> K2 wrote:
>
> > I convert 4 swingpoints into bonus vote.
> > I make some Right handed Grapefruit Juice using my Right Handed
> > Grapefruit, this causes some difficulty 'cause I'm left handed
> > :)
> > I offer the Right Handed Grapefruit I just created in excange for Mr.
> > Tambourine Man's Amber Banana.
> > I offer A$ 15 to JT in exchange for eir Amber Banana.
> >
> > To any entities which own an Amber Banana I make a similar offer.
> >
> > In reply to Joe Java, regarding the Sword of Kahless, I state: This
> > Trinket is Majik.

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 04:33:41 -0400 (EDT)
From: Uri Bruck <[email-masked]>
Subject: acka : SwingPoint conversion

I convert 4 of my SwingPoints to a Bonus Vote

Niccolo Flychuck

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 06:17:51 -0400 (EDT)
From: "Tom Walmsley" <[email-masked]>
Subject: Re: Acka: Oy!

> BTW, (and this is directed to TGW/Mr. Tambourine Man), if I went and wrote
> a simple CGI script that given a database of CFJs one to a file let you
> search for all the CFJs with specific words, etc, would you want it/be
> able to run it?  Being able to search those archives sensibly would be
> really handy, especially for those of us who don't have the time to read
> them all :)

I know absolutely nothing about any sort of computer programming language
(actually, I tell a lie, I know a bit of Amstrad CPC BASIC) so I could only
run it if all it required me to do was FTP it to brain.mics.net and let it
sit there. That is of course presuming that my web space has no problems
running this type of thing (if that's a really dumb thing to say then don't
blame, I'm just a dunce :-). If you want to check then ask IdiotBoy who
kindly provides the webspace for me. Other than all that, yes I would want
it, providing it wasn't too much work.

Mr. Tambourine Man.

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 06:19:29 -0400 (EDT)
From: "Tom Walmsley" <[email-masked]>
Subject: Re: acka : SwingPoint conversion

> I convert 4 of my SwingPoints to a Bonus Vote
> 
> Niccolo Flychuck

I do likewise.

Mr. Tambourine Man.

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 08:37:25 -0400 (EDT)
From: "Tom Walmsley" <[email-masked]>
Subject: Acka: Trinket creation and distribution

I create a trinket valued at A$50 called the Teaching Diploma with a
description as follows:

"Many thanks to Koxvolio who helped a Gingham Wearing Tambourine Man out in
his hour of need by teaching him how to do motion in a vertical circle two
days before his A-Level Mechanics exam."

I then give this trinket to Koxvolio.

Mr. Tambourine Man.

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 09:07:25 -0400 (EDT)
From: K2 <"kii@kii"@internex.net.au>
Subject: Re: Acka: Church

Oh most enlightened one,
    pls allow me to worship the most wonderous of entities that is the brass
monkey.

K 2

Towsner wrote:

>         I announce my intent to found a Church named The Order of the Brass
> Monkey, devoted to the worship of the much-deserving Brass Monkey.
>
> --
> -Henry Towsner
>
>         <[email-masked]>
>
>         Success is the child of audacity.
>                 -Benjamin Disraeli

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 11:20:27 -0400 (EDT)
From: "Tom Walmsley" <[email-masked]>
Subject: Acka: CFJ 602 (FALSE)

With about an hour to spare rufus has judged this FALSE.

Clerk of the Courts
- -----------------------------------------------------------------------
Call For Judgement 602- May 24, 1998
Subject: CFCJ 163
Initiator: The Gingham Wearer (sent May 24, 1998, 11:30)
Judge: rufus (selected May 24, 1998, 11:33)
Judgement: FALSE

Statement:
A CFCJ numbered 163 has been issued.

Initiator's Reasoning:
I don't really care either way but we ought to know. If it has been then I
need to select a cortex for it. If it isn't then I can write in the archives
that it doesn't actually exist. It was the latter of 2 CFCJs accusing Hubert
of Rampant exhibitionism and so should probably never have been issued
according to section 10) of rule 710.

Judge's Reasoning:
710, section 10 clearly bars double jeoparday.  CFCJ 161
charges Hubert with te same crime for the same action, so 163 is an
impossible CFCJ.  

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 11:24:24 -0400 (EDT)
From: Jonathan David Amery <[email-masked]>
Subject: Re: Acka: CFJ 603 (AtP)

 #kill thread splits

 If I am not enlightened then the world is banna shaped and the set of
colo(u)rs doesn't include black.

 #endkill

 Wild Card

On Sat, 30 May 1998, Tom Walmsley wrote:

> AtP has been selected.
> 
> Clerk of the Courts
> -----------------------------------------------------------------------
> Call For Judgement 603- May 30, 1998
> Subject: Playing With Fire
> Initiator: Hubert (sent May 29, 1998, 17:20)
> Judge: Atilla the Pun (selected May 30, 1998, 08:59)
> Judgement: 
> 
> Statement:
> Neither Slakko nor Wild Card is Enlightened.
> 

- -- 
Jonathan David Amery, Trinity Hall, Trinity Lane, CAMBRIDGE, CB2 1TJ.
http://www.trinhall.cam.ac.uk/~jda23/home.html | [email-masked]
"The last human being on the Earth sat alone in a room.  There was a knock
on the door..."                                      -Shortest SF story...

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 11:26:04 -0400 (EDT)
From: David Scheidt <[email-masked]>
Subject: Re: Acka: CFJ 603 (AtP)

On Sun, 31 May 1998, Jonathan David Amery wrote:

>  If I am not enlightened then the world is banna shaped and the set of
> colo(u)rs doesn't include black.

This is true even if your are enlightened.  

banna,

rufus

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 11:34:37 -0400 (EDT)
From: Matt Miller <[email-masked]>
Subject: Re: Acka: Oy!

On Sun, 31 May 1998, Tom Walmsley wrote:

> I know absolutely nothing about any sort of computer programming language
> (actually, I tell a lie, I know a bit of Amstrad CPC BASIC) so I could only
> run it if all it required me to do was FTP it to brain.mics.net and let it
> sit there. That is of course presuming that my web space has no problems
> running this type of thing (if that's a really dumb thing to say then don't
> blame, I'm just a dunce :-). If you want to check then ask IdiotBoy who
> kindly provides the webspace for me. Other than all that, yes I would want
> it, providing it wasn't too much work.
> 
> Mr. Tambourine Man.
> 

Well, it won't work if you do that.  However, out of the kindness of my
heart I might be willingto make it work.  Hehe.

IB

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 11:36:33 -0400 (EDT)
From: Jonathan David Amery <[email-masked]>
Subject: Re: Acka: GAD: Violet (6)

On Sat, 30 May 1998, Matt Miller wrote:

> I think it best if I grab breadbox's donkey.

 I'm calling a snowgod's disease hearing on Idiot Boy for this, valid
responses are:

 "Yes, why just yesterday e posted a letter to eir aunt!"

 and

 "No, e, uh, meant to do that."

 Wild Card.

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 11:37:20 -0400 (EDT)
From: "Tom Walmsley" <[email-masked]>
Subject: Re: Acka: Oy!

> Well, it won't work if you do that.  However, out of the kindness of my
> heart I might be willingto make it work.  Hehe.

Stop laughing at me. I said I know nothing didn't I?!? :-). Thank you for
being so kind though. :-)

Mr. Tambourine Man.

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 11:38:28 -0400 (EDT)
From: Jonathan David Amery <[email-masked]>
Subject: Re: Acka: CFJ 603 (AtP)

On Sun, 31 May 1998, David Scheidt wrote:

> On Sun, 31 May 1998, Jonathan David Amery wrote:
> 
> >  If I am not enlightened then the world is banna shaped and the set of
> > colo(u)rs doesn't include black.
> 
> 
> This is true even if your are enlightened.  
> 
> banna,
> 
 Actually you're right - but I'm not saying it if I'm not enlightened.

 If I am enlightened then I will not profane my posts by saying something
so obvious...

 Wild Card.

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 11:40:37 -0400 (EDT)
From: Jonathan David Amery <[email-masked]>
Subject: !!!PRIV!!!  Re: Acka: GAD: Violet (6)

 Please reply to /this/ message - which is sent to acka-priv...

On Sun, 31 May 1998, Jonathan David Amery wrote:

> On Sat, 30 May 1998, Matt Miller wrote:
> 
> > I think it best if I grab breadbox's donkey.
> 
>  I'm calling a snowgod's disease hearing on Idiot Boy for this, valid
> responses are:
> 
>  "Yes, why just yesterday e posted a letter to eir aunt!"
> 
>  and
> 
>  "No, e, uh, meant to do that."
> 
>  Wild Card.
> 
> 

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 11:46:04 -0400 (EDT)
From: "Tom Walmsley" <[email-masked]>
Subject: [none]

The following are the results of the snowgod's disease hearing I called on
Vynd, except I couldn't be bothered writing up the responses in full.

Yes
Wild Card & EBS
Ayla & EBS
K 2
Slakko & EBS
Hubert

No
Rex Mundi & EBS
Vynd & EBS
ThinMan & EBS
Attila the Pun

This means Vynd has been found to be infected with the dreaded disease. My
recommended treatment is to go and spend three days out in the wilds. The air
will do you good.

Mr. Tambourine Man.

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 11:53:46 -0400 (EDT)
From: David Scheidt <[email-masked]>
Subject: acka: pe page

I seem to recall that at one point i had a trinket called the sceptre of
banna #0.  I don't remember getting rid of it, and I am not listed as
having it on the P/E pages.

Also, the trinket page list no The Sceptre of banna #2.  Did I fail to
create this, or has some heathen destroyed it?

rufus

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 12:00:04 -0400 (EDT)
From: "Tom Walmsley" <[email-masked]>
Subject: Re: acka: pe page

> Also, the trinket page list no The Sceptre of banna #2.  Did I fail to
> create this, or has some heathen destroyed it?

The Sceptre of Banna #2 currently lies at the bottom of the Ackanomic river.
I lost it on one of my rafting trips. I am most repentant for this oh
enlightened one.

Mr. Tambourine Man.

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 12:08:20 -0400 (EDT)
From: [email-masked] (Aaron V. Humphrey)
Subject: Acka: Re: your mail

> The following are the results of the snowgod's disease hearing I called on
> Vynd, except I couldn't be bothered writing up the responses in full.

Not entering a subject line, apparently.  :-)

> Yes
> Wild Card & EBS
> Ayla & EBS
> K 2
> Slakko & EBS
> Hubert

> No
> Rex Mundi & EBS
> Vynd & EBS
> ThinMan & EBS
> Attila the Pun

> This means Vynd has been found to be infected with the dreaded disease. My
> recommended treatment is to go and spend three days out in the wilds. The air
> will do you good.

Alternatively, e can wait until the end of the calendar month.  Which, as I
recall, is not too darned far away.

- --
- --Alfvaen(Web page: http://www.telusplanet.net/public/alfvaen/ )
Song In My Head--Rupert Hine:The Curious Kind
Current Book--Mary Stewart:The Moon-Spinners
I'm not a member of the Animal Kingdom.  I'm from the Animal Republic.

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 12:14:47 -0400 (EDT)
From: David Scheidt <[email-masked]>
Subject: acka: movement

I go to the library.  I go to *that* room.  

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 14:20:07 -0400 (EDT)
From: JT <[email-masked]>
Subject: Re: acka: pe page

On Sun, 31 May 1998, David Scheidt wrote:
>I seem to recall that at one point i had a trinket called the sceptre of
>banna #0.  I don't remember getting rid of it, and I am not listed as
>having it on the P/E pages.

According to the trinket database that I have, Sceptres of Banna #0, 1,
and 3 are still in existance, therefore someone has them (or at least
did when I built the database off of Alfvaen's page before K2 took it
over and I haven't seen the scepter of Banna #0 get destroyed since then 
:))

>Also, the trinket page list no The Sceptre of banna #2.  Did I fail to
>create this, or has some heathen destroyed it?

This one was not still owned as far as I can tell, so it's possible it got
destroyed with an undead disintigration.

However, I don't have any record of that destruction, I merely went based
on the state of Alfvaen's pages when I initially set up this database, so
it's possible it contains errors, and I'll be happy to correct it if
someone can assure me that the object wasn't destroyed.

- --JT

[-------------------------------------------------------------------------]
[ Practice random kindness and senseless acts of beauty.                  ]
[ It's hard to seize the day when you must first grapple with the morning ]
[-------------------------------------------------------------------------]

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 15:42:01 -0400 (EDT)
From: [email-masked] (Dice server)
Subject: Acka: Ackanomicon Determination

- -----BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE-----

Dice rolls requested by: [email-masked] (Aaron V. Humphrey)
Rolls also sent to:
    [email-masked]

# Player: rufus
# Ackanomicon determination
# based on the following (using a 50 sided die):
# 1 -15: arcane trivia
# 16-20: vile prophecies
# 21-25: inner workings
# 26-30: arcane lore
# 31-33: terrorizing pages
# 34-34: ancient artifact
# 35-36: mutation
# 37-38: dark domain
# 39-39: stock market crash
# 40-41: long lost treasure
# 42-43: doomsday
# 44-44: forbidden fruit
# 45-45: catastrophe
# 46-49: not so forbidden fruit
# 50-50: ancient one
# Alfvaen

No. of sides on every die:     50
No. of dice for every roll:     1
No. of dice rolls requested:    1
No. of rolls per line:          1

     46

Information on the dice server:
   DO NOT REPLY TO THIS MESSAGE!
   Replies to [email-masked] vanish into a seldom-read mailbox.

   For instructions on using the dice server, send a message with
   subject "help" to [email-masked], or see http://www.pbm.com/dice/

   The dice server is provided by:

      Shadow Island Games
      http://www.pbm.com/ds.html

Original message follows:
> From [email-masked]  Sun May 31 12:41:45 1998
> Received: (from smtp@localhost) by xkey.com
>       id MAA01613 for <[email-masked]>; Sun, 31 May 1998 12:41:45 -0700
> Received: from edtntnt1-port-246.agt.net(209.115.136.246) by xkey.com via smtp (V1.3)
>       id sma001595; Sun May 31 12:41:28 1998
> Received: (from alfvaen@localhost) by concordia.telusplanet.net (8.7.6/8.7.3) id NAA01004 for [email-masked]; Sun, 31 May 1998 13:41:08 -0600
> Message-Id: <[email-masked]>
> Subject: Acka: Dice
> To: [email-masked]
> Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 13:41:08 -0600 (MDT)
> Reply-To: [email-masked]
> From: [email-masked] (Aaron V. Humphrey)
> Content-Type: text
> 
> 
> 
> #P [email-masked]
> #S 50
> #D 1
> #R 1
> #L 1
> #T Acka: Ackanomicon Determination
> 
> #C Player: rufus
> #C Ackanomicon determination
> #C based on the following (using a 50 sided die):
> #C 1 -15: arcane trivia
> #C 16-20: vile prophecies
> #C 21-25: inner workings
> #C 26-30: arcane lore
> #C 31-33: terrorizing pages
> #C 34-34: ancient artifact
> #C 35-36: mutation
> #C 37-38: dark domain
> #C 39-39: stock market crash
> #C 40-41: long lost treasure
> #C 42-43: doomsday
> #C 44-44: forbidden fruit
> #C 45-45: catastrophe
> #C 46-49: not so forbidden fruit
> #C 50-50: ancient one
> #C Alfvaen
> 
> 
> --
> --Alfvaen(Web page: http://www.telusplanet.net/public/alfvaen/ )
> Current Song--Coolio:Gangsta's Paradise
> Current Book--Mary Stewart:The Moon-Spinners
> Palindromic taglines are not on erase nilgatci mordnilap!

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------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 15:52:00 -0400 (EDT)
From: Duncan Richer <[email-masked]>
Subject: Acka: Otzma!

An Otzma Day will start three days from now.

Yours,
Slakko
RuneMaker
minimalist

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 15:56:29 -0400 (EDT)
From: Duncan Richer <[email-masked]>
Subject: Acka: snowgod's Disease Hearing Results (J. M. Bear)

The Hearing closed earlier today (Wild Card attempted to change eir vote,
unfortunately e was too late).

Verdict: 9-4 for "Yes, why just yesterday e posted a letter to eir aunt!"

Suggested Cure courtesy of the Undergraduate Medical Student:
Rest for several hours.  You'll automatically receive a cure.

Yours,
Slakko
ex-Undergraduate Medical Student
still minimalist

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 18:03:10 -0400 (EDT)
From: "Tom Walmsley" <[email-masked]>
Subject: Re: Acka: Otzma!

> An Otzma Day will start three days from now.

About time too! :-). There must be about five new types of otzma cards since
the last one.

Mr. Tambourine Man.

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 18:42:01 -0400 (EDT)
From: Jonathan David Amery <[email-masked]>
Subject: Acka: Stuff

 I create a trinket of value A$1, named "Jade Grapefruit Juice" and with a
description "looks just like some Jade Grapefruit Juice".

 Wild Card.

------------------------------

Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 21:21:33 -0400 (EDT)
From: JT <[email-masked]>
Subject: Re: Acka: Stock Market

On Sat, 30 May 1998, Towsner wrote:

>	I think it's time to start slowing things down.  I suggest that the
>D-setting be set to 0.125 and the A-setting to 0.2.

I had meant to send this yesterday, but I also specify setting the
D-setting to 0.125 and the A-setting to 0.2

- --JT

[-------------------------------------------------------------------------]
[ Practice random kindness and senseless acts of beauty.                  ]
[ It's hard to seize the day when you must first grapple with the morning ]
[-------------------------------------------------------------------------]

------------------------------

End of ackanomic digest V3 #177
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