Subject: ackanomic digest V3 #42
From: [email-masked] (ackanomic digest)
To: [email-masked]

ackanomic digest      Saturday, February 28 1998      Volume 03 : Number 042

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Date: Sat, 28 Feb 1998 02:12:00 -0500 (EST)
From: [email-masked] (Aaron V. Humphrey)
Subject: Acka: Big White Gazette

The Big White Gazette

"Wasting Bandwidth For Some Period of Time"

The Big White Gazette would like to apologize for what is obviously a
blatant attempt to avoid going belly-up for not having published in
February.  In explanation, the editorial staff would only like to offer
the explanation that in their continuing efforts to come up with more
and more irrelevant trivia regarding the game of Ackanomic, they have
to devote more and more time to organizing the information into a form
the public can digest.

Thus we have here some still-unfinished investigations into the mind-
numbing irrelevancies of:

Fantasy Viruses

Here's an interesting question:  What would have happened if, after any
turn of the current Viruses game, the players ceased submitting moves?
Who would win?  After how long?  Whose virus(es) would be left after the
configuration settled down(into stable and cyclic patterns, and possibly
gliders)?  How long would _that_ take?

After the first Round of moves, rufus ended up with the first viruspoint.
If left to evolve, rufus would have gained another viruspoint the next
Round, but after that ThinMan would have gone on to win over the next
twelve rounds, with a brief challenge from Slakko, who would gain one
viruspoint in Round 9 and tie with ThinMan in Round 10.  However, the
question of long-term survival would be settled somewhat differently.
breadbox's and The Gingham Wearer's viruses had died out already by
Round 3, but ThinMan's would be next to go in Round 26, and /dev/joe's
in Round 30.  rufus's and Slakko's were left to coexist, and were still
going strong and showing few signs of slowing down, covering an active
area of 94 rows and 89 columns(some of that admittedly because of a
rufus-glider heading off to the northeast), by Round 250.

If you start after the second round(in which nobody scored a viruspoint),
Slakko wins by Round 14, with breadbox stealing a point in Round 8 and
/dev/joe in Round 11.  In long-term survival, there was a steady stream of
disappearances, with rufus in Round 5, Balsamic Dragon in Round 6, The
Gingham Wearer in Round 7, two-star and Thinman in Round 8, and then
else...if in Round 14 and breadbox and Red Barn in Round 15, leaving only
Slakko and /dev/joe.  By Round 19 Slakko had been left with only a block
of four, but miraculously this square remained until /dev/joe's sprawling
pattern settled down by Round 483 with one glider, seven blocks, four
blinkers, and two boats.

From after the third round, things get more interesting.  rufus and
Slakko each had a gamepoint already, but got no more.  two-star picked
one up in Round 4, but then The Gingham Wearer took Rounds 6 and 8(5, 7
and 9 being tied).  And then, Red Barn took a surprise lead.  The Gingham
Wearer had a glider, but eir other cells dwindled away as Red Barn soon
had the only other non-stable pattern.  Unfortunately, by Round 15 Red
Barn's pattern had overtaken the glider, and e scored eir seventh and
last viruspoint in Round 16.  Eir virus was gone entirely by Round 19,
and The Gingham Wearer's new pattern evolved rapidly until by Round 25 e
had won.  Interestingly, The Gingham Wearer was also the long-term winner;
ThinMan had disappeared in Round 6, /dev/joe in Round 7, Slakko in Round
8, else...if and rufus in Round 9, breadbox in Round 13, and Red Barn
in Round 19 as mentioned above, but two-star had maintained a hexagon
since Round 12 and Balsamic Dragon a blinker since Round 9, which still
remained at the end.  By Round 35 The Gingham Wearer had four hexagons,
and the overall pattern was settled.

From after the fourth round, when Slakko had a second viruspoint, e
continued to gain until Round 7, when The Gingham Wearer and Balsamic
Dragon both had more cells(but also tied, for no score).  However, Slakko
regained eir lead and coasted to a victory in Round 13.  In terms of
survival, rufus, breadbox and ThinMan had all washed out in Round 7,
/dev/joe in Round 8, and Red Barn in Round 10.  else...if hung on until
Round 19, The Gingham Wearer until Round 23, and Balsamic Dragon until
Round 24.  two-star retained a four-cell block until the end, though,
in Round 33, when Slakko's pattern settled down to a flasher(not to be
confused with a blinker; you know, two diagonally adjacent blocks).

From after the fifth round, when The Gingham Wearer had gotten eir first
viruspoint, e got two more in Round 6 and 7.  two-star snuck ahead to get
one in Round 8, but The Gingham Wearer regained eir lead in Round 9 and
retained it until Round 13, when two-star stole another.  The Gingham
Wearer got a point in Round 14, then tied with two-star in Round 15.
two-star took another two points in the next two rounds, and then the two
leaders' patterns fell apart and other jumped in.  Slakko took two
viruspoints in Rounds 18 and 19, then /dev/joe in Rounds 20 and 21, Slakko
again in Round 22, /dev/joe in Round 23.  Then ThinMan came out of nowhere
to take three viruspoints in Round 24-26, before the return of two-star in
Round 27, although ThinMan grabbed another in Round 28.  two-star took one
more in Round 29, but Round 30 saw the return of The Gingham Wearer.
two-star took another in Round 31, but Round 32 saw The Gingham Wearer
score eir tenth point at long last.  All in all, perhaps the closest
competition so far.  In terms of survival, Red Barn disappeared in Round 6,
rufus in Round 7, and breadbox in Round 11; else...if hung on until Round
20, and Balsamic Dragon until Round 26.  All the others were still going
strong, though, as the above scoring results indicate.  ThinMan lasted
until Round 41, and Slakko until Round 185.  At Round 320 things had
settled down; the Gingham Wearer had one loaf, /dev/joe a block and a
blinker, and two-star two hexagons and two blocks.

From after the sixth round, when Balsamic Dragon got eir viruspoint, eir
virus still almost disappeared in Round 7, and /dev/joe's did disappear
altogether, as The Gingham Wearer got a viruspoint.  And continued to do
so until obtaining ten points in Round 15.  In terms of survival, things
got a bit more interesting.  rufus's virus disappeared in Round 9, Balsamic
Dragon's in Round 12, breadbox's in Round 14, Slakko's in Round 17, and
ThinMan's in Round 23.  Interestingly, two-star's seemed to be doing well
until it contacted else...if's stationary block.  The result, however,
was that two-star's virus disappeared in Round 36, while else...if's was
thriving from the contact.  In fact, by Round 83 it had overwhelmed The
Gingham Wearer's, and continued to evolve until by Round 564 it had
achieved a stable pattern with eleven blocks, seven blinkers, three loaves,
a hexagon, and two gliders.

(Research to be continued...)

- --
- --Alfvaen(Web page: http://www.telusplanet.net/public/alfvaen/ )
Current Song--13 Engines:More
Current Book--Katie Waitman:The Merro Tree
She said it was okay, but I felt like I just ate my young

------------------------------

Date: Sat, 28 Feb 1998 02:43:18 -0500 (EST)
From: Brian Raiter <[email-masked]>
Subject: Re: Acka: I'm Gonna Fix That Rule Later

> When Balsamic Dragon left the game, I immediately became acting
> Clerk of the Court.  As the vacancy in the position of Clerk of the
> Court was created by Balsamic leaving the game, not going on
> vacation, I have no authority to appoint an Acting Officer.
> Therefore, until the nomination period is finished, I have no choice
> but to perform the role of Clerk of the Court.

Yep. That is, essentially, what the Office of President is all about.

Ideally, the President should also be available to make a good speech
in a crisis, and maybe get involved in an entertaining scandal or two,
but eir main purpose in life is to be the default Acting-anything when
an Officer ups and leaves without warning, until a suitable
replacement can be properly appointed.

breadbox

------------------------------

Date: Sat, 28 Feb 1998 02:47:45 -0500 (EST)
From: Duncan Richer <[email-masked]>
Subject: Re: Acka: I'm Gonna Fix That Rule Later

On Sat, 28 Feb 1998, Brian Raiter wrote:

> > When Balsamic Dragon left the game, I immediately became acting
> > Clerk of the Court.  As the vacancy in the position of Clerk of the
> > Court was created by Balsamic leaving the game, not going on
> > vacation, I have no authority to appoint an Acting Officer.
> > Therefore, until the nomination period is finished, I have no choice
> > but to perform the role of Clerk of the Court.
> 
> Yep. That is, essentially, what the Office of President is all about.

Ahhh, but the point is I don't have the authority to appoint an acting
officer in this case.  I am the default, and stuck as such.
Interestingly, this means that we made a mistake when Alfvaen was allowed
to appoint CnH Acting Praetor when Malenkai left - that should never have
happened, as there was no authority for an acting appointment.  Too late
now.

> Ideally, the President should also be available to make a good speech
> in a crisis, and maybe get involved in an entertaining scandal or two,
> but eir main purpose in life is to be the default Acting-anything when
> an Officer ups and leaves without warning, until a suitable
> replacement can be properly appointed.

Now they tell me :-)
Yours,
Slakko
- -- 
Duncan C. "" Richer aka
Slakko (Lost) Warner - http://dcr24.quns.cam.ac.uk/ - Queens' College
Cambridge, 1st Yr PhD(PMa) - .Nomic Elector, Frgn Minister, HP(Morpork)
Acka - President "Gumball" Web-Harfer RuneMaker ChessUmpire Map-Harfer
Acting CotC Acting Ambassador

------------------------------

Date: Sat, 28 Feb 1998 02:51:05 -0500 (EST)
From: Duncan Richer <[email-masked]>
Subject: Re: Acka: I'm Gonna Fix That Rule Later

On Sat, 28 Feb 1998, Duncan Richer wrote:

> Ahhh, but the point is I don't have the authority to appoint an acting
> officer in this case.  I am the default, and stuck as such.
> Interestingly, this means that we made a mistake when Alfvaen was allowed
> to appoint CnH Acting Praetor when Malenkai left - that should never have
> happened, as there was no authority for an acting appointment.  Too late
> now.

Sorry - mistake made.  Please ignore ignorant President :-)

- -- 
Duncan C. "" Richer aka
Slakko (Lost) Warner - http://dcr24.quns.cam.ac.uk/ - Queens' College
Cambridge, 1st Yr PhD(PMa) - .Nomic Elector, Frgn Minister, HP(Morpork)
Acka - President "Gumball" Web-Harfer RuneMaker ChessUmpire Map-Harfer

------------------------------

Date: Sat, 28 Feb 1998 02:54:46 -0500 (EST)
From: Duncan Richer <[email-masked]>
Subject: Acka: INP 363 problem

Balsamic Dragon was the Hearing Harfer for the votes, right?

She _still_is_.
No rule allows us to change the Hearing Harfer midstream as far as I can
tell.  
So it appears we're going to end up abstaining on INP 363 anyway, because
we won't get the next Hearing finished in time.

I am initiating (if I can) a Hearing on INP 363.  Valid votes are FOR and
AGAINST.

Yours,
Slakko
acting Ambassador

- -- 
Duncan C. "" Richer aka
Slakko (Lost) Warner - http://dcr24.quns.cam.ac.uk/ - Queens' College
Cambridge, 1st Yr PhD(PMa) - .Nomic Elector, Frgn Minister, HP(Morpork)
Acka - President "Gumball" Web-Harfer RuneMaker ChessUmpire Map-Harfer

------------------------------

Date: Sat, 28 Feb 1998 03:14:17 -0500 (EST)
From: Duncan Richer <[email-masked]>
Subject: Acka: CFJ 512 (FALSE)

Call For Judgement 512
Subject: Malenkai's playerhood
Initiator: Bill the pirate king
Judge: Crackfoo (deadbeat)
2nd Judge: Malenkai (declined)
3rd Judge: Supreme Court
Judgement: FALSE

Statement:

Malenkai was unable to leave the game.

Initiator's Comments:

Rule one states that "Those players who were members of Vulcan on August
28, 1997 [/dev/joe, Malenkai, ThinMan, andVynd] are Evil Overlords of
Ackanomic (retired)"
This I take as meaning they are always the only members of the Evil
Overlords Of Ackanomic (retired)(hereafter EOA).
The rule also states "No other players and no non-players are
EvilOverlords of Ackanomic (retired). "
So malenkai must be a member of EOA, but as a non player cannot be a
member of EOA.

So either malenkai was unable to leave, or the customary interpretation
of rule one must change. As rule one states "The game state may not be
altered in such a way as to cause the customary interpretation of this
rule to be changed." The customary interpretation may not be changed and
so malenkai was unable to leave the game.

Judge's Comments:

See CFJ 513 for reasoning.

------------------------------

Date: Sat, 28 Feb 1998 03:19:12 -0500 (EST)
From: Duncan Richer <[email-masked]>
Subject: Acka: CFJ 526 (TRUE, upheld, upheld)

Call For Judgement 526
Subject: Cycle Win
Initiator: Slakko
Judge: rufus
Judgement: TRUE
Appealed by Malenkai
Judgement: TRUE
Appealed by Guy Fawkes
Judgement: TRUE

Statement:

Slakko has won a Cycle of Ackanomic.

Initiator's Comments:

The Chrome Streak Agenda Hat has been trivially TRUE.
The Attributes Agenda Hat is currently true, if you accept that titles
are attributes and membership of organizations are attributes. You don't
even need to worry about trinkets.
This only leaves the misspellings.

I have submitted upwards of 30 messages containing the text "letturc".
Upwards of 10 of these have included at least 10 instances of
deliberately misspelled words, which could be corrected to more than one
English word, and are hence ambiguously misspelled words (and therefore
not subject to Rule 340). According to the definitions in the second of
the fictionary dictionaries, which I omit here for brevity (and because
I'm frankly sick of them by now) "letturc" is a word when it is included
as part of a sentence. It is ambiguous because I have stated two ways in
which it can be corrected. However, in one message I stated exactly what
"letturc" should be taken to mean. Therefore it did have a "correct" form
- - namely the word lettuce. In that message, I used "letturc" ten times.
Lettuce has seven letters, a prime number of letters. So there were at
least 10 misspelled words in that message, all of which contain a prime
number of letters when in their proper form.

Therefore the misspelling hat is TRUE.

Therefore all three Agenda Hats have been true simultaneously at some
point in the fortnight immediately prior to the announcement of this CFJ.

Therefore Slakko has won a Cycle of Ackanomic.

Judge's Comments:

More or less what he said. Two big points really, first all spelling
errors are ambiguous; second, messages sent to the lists need not make
sense.

Appealer's Comments:

I'd like the Court to take a closer look at 'attributes on the
Player/Entity page'. Throughout the whole discussion, that seemed the
most dubious, and I personally do not feel it has been satisfied, but
will accept the Court's stamp of approval or disapproval in any case.

Supreme Court's Comments:

The "Attributes Agenda Hat" says that the player must have fifteen or
more attributes listed on the Player/Entity page, a web page that is
currently maintained by the Speaker/Financier/Web-Harfer. On this page
are listed data such as the players' possessions, titles, organizational
memberships, and much other information that is necessary or useful to
tracking the game state. Which of these data, if any, are "attributes"?

Since the word does not have a particular meaning inherited from the
rules or game custom, standard English meaning must provide the answer.
But the problem with this approach is that it provides far too much
meaning; that is, the word "attribute" is used in many ways, in many
different contexts, to provide a wide variety of distinctions.

For example, one Justice of the Court favors the idea that "attributes"
refers to the adjectival descriptions that the rules occasionally bestow
upon players, usually with the phrasing "The player is said to be...."
This would include "silly", "foolish", "Weird", "Really Weird",
"Enlightened", and "Guilty of Patent Infringement". However, there is no
good reason to accept these but not accept Titles - which are also
bestowed upon players by the rules, and which hardly differ from the
previous descriptions, except in name. Titles, in turn, can be argued to
be extremely similar to Offices being held. And if Offices count, then
really, why not organizational memberships? And so on.

When faced with such a slippery slope, the Court has found, in the past,
that there is rarely a middle ground that can be objectively defended by
argument, and the best thing to do is to side with one of the two
extremes. In this case, that would mean that either nothing on the
Player/Entity web page is an attribute, or everything is.

The only real argument for the first choice is that the rules do not
define the term "attribute", and so nothing can be an attribute until the
rules define it. The Court finds this argument unsatisfying, and somewhat
against the spirit of the game. The second choice seems more in keeping
with the highly inclusive nature of the word's definition. The actual
contents of the Player/Entity page are essentially unregulated by the
rules. In the end, it seems fair to argue that, for the purposes of this
Agenda Hat, a player attribute on the Player/Entity web page is simply
anything that the current maintainer considers important enough to list
there.

By this definition, Slakko has the number of attributes required to
satisfy the Agenda Hat.

This leaves the now-notorious question of the misspellings. The
requirement is to post a message with no less than ten misspelled words,
all of which have a prime number of letters when spelled correctly. In an
attempt to keep this brief, the Court will only review two of Slakko's
messages, and hopefully the interested reader can infer from them the
reasoning used to judge the remaining ones.

This message was posted at Wed, 28 Jan 1998 17:41:

> letturc letturc letturc letturc letturc letturc letturc letturc letturc
> letturc mkssage
> 
> Happy now?

The Court does not believe this fulfills the requirement. Without
sentence structure, or indeed context of any sort, there is no reason to
believe that these are even misspelled words, much less words with a
prime number of letters. The message makes just as much sense as it is -
specifically, none at all - than it does by treating "letturc" as a
misspelling of "letters" (or "letter", "lettres", "lettuce", "lattice",
etc).

The second message was posted at Thu, 29 Jan 1998 14:54, and read in
part:

> [...] I claim that my use of the text "letturc letturc letturc
> letturc letturc letturc letturc letturc letturc letturc" in this
> sentence, each instance of the text "letturc" as it occurs within
> this paragraph meaning either lettuce or letters but not both, is a
> blatant attempt to win....

Here, the surrounding context makes it clear (in a vacuously direct
fashion), that the repeated word "letturc" is in fact a misspelling, and
that the word, when correctly spelled, has seven letters. The fact that
it cannot be determined from context which word was the correct word
means that all instances of "letturc" are ambiguous for the purposes of
Rule 340, and cannot be treated as being correctly spelled. We do not
know what the correctly spelled words are, but we do know that they
exist, and that they each have a prime number of letters.

Thus the Court believes that at this time Slakko fulfilled the condition
of his third Agenda Hat, and, in the absence of other hindrances,
received the title Agent of KAOS and won the Cycle.

The appealer is penalized 12 points.

2nd Appealer's Comments:

The public message which the Supreme Court has most recently decided has
given Slakko a win (via its misspellings) is quoted in part below.

>> [...] I claim that my use of the text "letturc letturc letturc
>> letturc letturc letturc letturc letturc letturc letturc" in this
>> sentence, each instance of the text "letturc" as it occurs within
>> this paragraph meaning either lettuce or letters but not both, is a
>> blatant attempt to win....

The Agenda Hat which this sentence is believed to fulfill is to post a
public message which contains at least ten misspelled words, all of which
have a prime number of letters in their properly spelled forms. In this
reasoning, I will show that Slakko's attempt to include this text in his
public message failed.

CFJ 336, Judge's comments.

> I was at first inclined to judge FALSE, based on the argument that
> public posts were not always game actions. I do not find Rules 370 and
> 372 in conflict with that reasoning. However, the fact that Rules 374
> and 1307, and perhaps others, make the text of any public post suitable
> for invoking a game response lead me to conclude that any public post
> must be construed as a game action. As such, R 709 prohibits players in
> Gaol from making public posts. 

CFJ 336 dealt with the question of whether a player in Gaol was permitted
to make a public post. The confusion arose due to a clause in Rule 709
which prohibited a player in Gaol from taking any game action not
included on a list of permitted actions found in that Rule. The initiator
of CFJ 336 interpreted this to mean that a Gaoled player could not make a
public post except in conjunction with performing the permitted
activities for Gaolbirds, holding that any public message was indeed a
public action. The judge upheld this interpretation, setting a game
custom that any text included in a public message constiuted a public
action. This game custom is still valid today, since Rule 709 (Gaol) now
includes sending up to three public messages a day on a list of actions
that Gaolbirds may perform.

The implication is clear: the text of any public message constitutes an
attempted public action, even if that attempted action is nothing more
than sending a public message with that text.

Rule 373, paragraph 3.

> The rules may specify that certain possible courses of play are public
> actions. Any active player may attempt any public action available
> to him or her simply by sending a public message specifying the action
> to be taken. However, if any information that is necessary to
> specify the action fully and unambiguously is left out of that message,
> then the attempt fails. [An attempt may also fail for other reasons.] 

Slakko failed to fully and unambiguously specify the text of his public
message, and so the message contained no text (or at the very least did
not contain the paragraph which the Supreme Court has judged to give
Slakko the win, which matters little for returning the correct FALSE
verdict.) In most cases, character strings such as "letturc" are fully
and unambiguously specified as either misspelled words whose proper
spelling can be determined from context, meaningless strings of
characters, or encryption (such as a Treasure Map). Slakko's message
insists, however, that the use of "letturc" in it corresponds to either a
misspelled form of the word "lettuce" or a misspelled form of the word
"letters". What the text actually is remains ambiguous, and so his public
message failed to contain that text, whose inclusion in a public message
would constitute a public action.

Imagine that there currently exists a Treasure map which specifies that
the Treasure shall be found by the first player in Ackanomic history to
post a public message in which the first occurrence of the string
"letturc" was a misspelled form of the word "lettuce". Has Slakko
fulfilled the map conditions?

This illustrates the ambiguity of his public action, and the reason for
its failure.

In summary:
1) Slakko posted a public message.
2) He attempted to include text in this message. This constitutes a
public action.
3) He was deliberately ambiguous about what the text of his public
message was. (Not what characters in what order were in the message, but
what resulting text was.)
4) This results in his action being ambiguously specified.
5) His attempt to include this text in his message failed.

Any message whose text says of itself that it is a misspelled word and
makes it ambiguous what that word is, is ambiguous, and the action of
including that text in a public message fails.

Supreme Court's Comments:

The appealer is correct in that sending a public message is a game
action. Note that the question of whether it is a public action was
glossed over. This has not been determined, and the rules defining a
public action have undergone minor changes since CFJ 336. Since this
point is irrelevant to what follows, the Court will take this as
granted for the purposes of this reasoning.

What is necessary to fully and unambiguously define a public message?
The Court believes that the rules and game custom would require
specifying the text alone (as well as its author, the time it was
sent, and so forth). The interpretation of the text does not have to
be unambiguous in order for it to qualify merely as being a public
message. The problem of the Treasure Map writer, offered by the
appealer, is not germane here: The rules do not forbid players from
writing poorly designed Treasure Maps, or indeed Maps with conditions
that they are completely incapable of detecting.

One could imagine that, upon the posting of his message, each
misspelling caused a thread split, where the misspelled word was
"lettuce" in one and "letters" in the other - for a total of 2048
different threads. If nothing in the game state was dependent on
knowing which word it was, then all of them immediately collapsed back
into a single thread. If something like a Treasure Map did require
knowing which thread was the actual game thread, then some or all of
them may persist. Regardless of which happened, it is incontrovertible
that the message fulfilled the requirements of Slakko's Agenda Hat in
all possible threads.

Penalty to the appealer: 20 points.

------------------------------

Date: Sat, 28 Feb 1998 06:14:18 -0500 (EST)
From: Joshua Herreshoff <[email-masked]>
Subject: Re: Acka: Good bye

> > On Fri, 27 Feb 1998, Thierry Joffrain wrote:
> > > I nominate Balsamic Dragon for the Hall of Elders.
> > I support the nomination of Balsamic Dragon to the Hall of Elders.
>
> I also support the nomination.

I support it as well.

------------------------------

Date: Sat, 28 Feb 1998 09:10:50 -0500 (EST)
From: "Gavin M. Doig" <[email-masked]>
Subject: acka: The Rex Times, vol. 21, no. 16

Still Still Buried

The Flora Amanita remains buried. How many more clues do you need?

Mediocrity

The end of this month saw rufus finally gain a Gamepoint in the ongoing game
of mediocrity, and so lose his winning position. This long-awaited happening
was a result of rufus not sending in a play for round 14, and so randomly
playing a 9.

The winning numbers for each of the 14 rounds so far are 11, 10, 8, 8, 6, 7,
8, 7, 6, 9, 2, 7, 6, and 9. Of these, 10 is the most mediocre. 6, 7, and 8
are the most common, having won 3 times each, followed by 9, with 2 wins,
and then 2, 10, and 11, with one win each.

Back Issues

The following back issues are now available:
vol. 5, no. 6
vol. 3, no. 5
vol. 14, no. 22
vol. 18, no. 8
vol. 25, no. 4
vol. 10, no. 5
vol. 7, no. 20
vol. 20, no. 16
vol. 9, no. 18
vol. 8, no. 21
vol. 12, no. 14
vol. 21, no. 16

------------------------------

Date: Sat, 28 Feb 1998 10:46:14 -0500 (EST)
From: Duncan Richer <[email-masked]>
Subject: Acka: The Infrequent Ackan Volume 1 Issue 12

Volume 1, Issue 12
February 28, 1998
In this issue:
1. Editorial
2. Poll Question #3 Results
3. More Ackanomic News
4. The Party Chess Report!
5. Sub-Game Spirali
6. Advertisement
 
Editorial
Ackanomic maintained its strangely Newtonian physics this week.  Two
players joined us last week, while this week saw the unexpected demise of
two others.  It is a time for reflection, well-timed to coincide with the
first Elder's Holiday for the year, that of mr cwm who unfortunately left
us earlier this year.
Still, merely because we are reflective does not mean that we should be
slow or even cautious.  There has been other tumultuous change this week,
as the make-up of Acka's Officers has been severely shaken.  We here at
the Ackan can only hope that the new officers maintain the excellent
standards that have been taken for granted in months gone by, and that
they can come out of the shadows of the mighty Malenkai, Alfvaen and
Balsamic Dragon to make their own mark on Acka through their good works.
The queue's frobbedness is having less of an effect this week, as more
Ackazens have decided to modify the place a bit.  With 25 proposals
currently under consideration, we still hope that breadbox has some time
left to work on his robot - I'm sure he remains very busy.  Still, the
lifeblood of Acka is change, and the right change is good.  One only hopes
that at least some proposals in the queue right now constitute the right
change. The Harfmeister (whose name we are unfortunately unable to publish
for legal reasons :-)) believes so, and who are we to doubt the Harf?
Illusion thinks e is one to doubt the Harf.  E claims that the Harf is
worshipped to the point that sight of all else becomes lost, and that
Phoebe told him so.  Phoebe would never say anything so crass - e must
have been hearing things.
And now a message from the Editor, Advertising:  This paper always aims to
provide Ackans with a comprehensive news and opinions service, so if you
want your opinions heard, or your letters published, please send them to
[email-masked]. Last week we didn't receive any advice, or opinions. If
you want, send a stamped self-addressed email to the address listed above,
marked "Acka: Ackan" and we'll do our best to get back to you.
Have another good Ackan week - banna willing we'll be back same Ack time,
same Ack channel next week.
 
Poll Question
Last week's Poll Question was:
2. What do you think of the proposed modifications to the Web-Harfer Front
Page?
(a) I hate it - stop meddling in the affairs of the Web-Harfer because you
obviously have no taste.
(b) I couldn't possibly care less - don't take up my time with this
non-issue.
(c) I like it - it improves the ease of access to information, and the
presentation.
Unfortunately, once again apathy has won the battle.  The staff here at
the Ackan received a grand total of 1 response to this poll - indicating
that 100% of caring Ackans are in favour of the proposed modifications to
the Web-Harfer Front Page.  The respondent indicated that more could be
done, and indeed more has been done since the accession of the new
Web-Harfer saw the proposed plan put into action pronto.  Our random
response selection has, once again, picked /dev/joe to be the winner.  The
trinket will follow in a message to come from our Manager, Promotions.
Given time, next week we'll try to come up with another poll question,
with, you guessed it, another tantalising A$5 on the line at least.
Remember, it costs very little of your time to enter, and you could win
something. /dev/joe already has (twice) in the Great Ackan Poll Question
Competition!
 
More Ackanomic News
Unfortunately this week saw the passing of two great Ackans.  Malenkai,
who was thought dead early in 1998, but remarkably crawled out of his
coffin to resume his duties as Registrar, and Balsamic Dragon, the last
Clerk of the Court, both passed on this week.
Grieving Ackans were at a loss to explain the sudden departure of two
great players.  Dr. Kevackian, the resident Ackan mortician, pronounced
the causes of death as "real life" and "work commitments" respectively.
Frankly, his use of such medical mumbo-jumbo had some Ackans quite irate.
"If he can't tell us what the real cause is in plain language, what is the
point of him telling us anything at all?"  one visibly shaken Ackan was
heard to comment.
Malenkai's death was, unfortunately, expected - as he had been feeling
"busy" for quite a while with "other things".  We have seen this as a
clear indicator of extreme health trouble in Acka before, but
unfortunately no-one was able to come up with a satisfactory treatment in
time.  Even an emergency course of Ye Olde Rusty Lantern failed to shake
the problem, possibly a consequence of his already having been pronounced
clinically dead only very recently.  Fortunately, though, Malenkai's
Elderhood was assured from this earlier traumatic episode, and thus his
corpse will be very well preserved so that we may study the course of this
so called "real life" disease.
Balsamic Dragon's passing came as more of a shock.  "E hadn't even
finished handing judgement down on a CFJ, and e was Clerk of the Court at
the time" said one Ackan.  "It's a shame to lose one in the prime of eir
Ackan life - it only reminds one of one's own Ackamortality".  Eir will
passed on all eir trinkets to breadbox, who it is believed will distribute
them so as to best express the true wishes of Balsamic.
We at the Ackan express our deepest condolences to the friends of Malenkai
and Balsamic Dragon, and hope to be able to help them in this difficult
time.  Malenkai, Balsamic Dragon, H.I.P.
 
The Party Chess Report
That's right, after an absence of a few issues, the Party Chess Report has
returned.  This week, a look at recent developments, a guide to the new
players, and predictions for the future.
The last significant report suggested that the centre of the Party Board
would be where the action was likely to head, due to the onrush of pawns
into the game.  This on-rush was effectively shut down just before the
Free-For-All got underway last month.  With the leader in the pawn race,
/dev/joe the Vulcan Swinger, blindsided by a spectacular three-piece
checkmate from Slakko, a forced Surrender (and a bungled Otzma Card
application) saw the central conflict calm down dramatically.  Alfvaen was
left in the best position to capitalise, but e too had trouble maintaining
eir pawns on the board.  Meanwhile, both Red Barn and Slakko had eir Pawns
ruthlessly captured, at the hands of Slakko and Goldenmean respectively.
This turned the expected central site battle into a debacle of monumental
proportions.
The Pawns captured by Slakko were just the start of an interesting
alternative battle for domination - the use of the Tornado.  An attempt by
Slakko to get Tornados involved in the game when e first joined blundered
spectacularly, when a failed checkmate attempt on /dev/joe saw both eir
Tornado and eir Tornado-impersonating Echo gobbled up by other players.
The second attempt, on the other hand, proved much more successful.  To
date the Tornado has captured 5 pieces, being a Jester, an il-Nabi, two
Pawns and a Rook.  Unfortunately, as a result of this Tornado's
efficiency, and its skill in being used to create checks from other
Swingers, it (and all other Tornados, including Alfvaen's new one) have
had their wings clipped.
The new battle for supremacy appears to be a three-way weight contest,
between Niccolo Flychuck, Alfvaen and Slakko.  Slakko is looking the loser
at the moment, being over 10 points behind Niccolo's leading weight of
73.5, but as everyone knows, this is Party Chess, where any move can have
a huge effect.
 
Sub Game Spirali
A delectable collection of subgame treats to delight the gourmand.
Viruses
/dev/joe has become the new tearaway Viruscount leader in Game 2 of
Viruses.  However, with all current players having 10 or more infected
cells, and /dev/joe only on 20, his reign in the lead may well be
shortlived.  The Gingham Wearer would still have to be rated favourite,
with 8 Gamepoints to /dev/joe's and Slakko's 2, but he would be doing
extremely well to get any help from the other players in taking out the
leader at this stage.  16 rounds done, and who knows how many more to go.
Fictionary
Alfvaen is still not a mathematical certainty to win Game 2 of Fictionary,
but is effectively home and hosed.  The only way to prevent this would be
to see breadbox or Slakko make an extreme streak, somehow pipping Alfvaen
at the post by garnering everyone else's votes for definitions.  I
personally can't see this kind of extreme anti-Alfvaen organisation
happening, especially as one of breadbox and Slakko would have to concede
second place to the other.  At this rate, second place is the only useful
contest left, with Alfvaen a smug winner (with a record 6 points in the
last round), and Vynd working hard to remain last.
Mediocrity
rufus finally won a round by some interesting random play.  Now that
everyone has at least one Gamepoint, the game enters a very crucial phase.
With the current spread of Gamepoints, the only players capable of winning
in the next round are /dev/joe and Slakko - either of whom would win were
the other player to win the Round.  Such a convoluted situation is
indicative of Mediocrity's complexity.  If you want the lowdown on the
real strategy, then don't ask me, ask Rex Mundi - Mediocrity Referee. Or
you could just wait for the next instalment in our Mediocre saga. 
YORL
Sam/Romeo on a rocket to the moon.  Or, at least a firecracker.  Where has
the Lunatic Finger gone?  Will Narf say anything like "poit"?  And who
will be taking over the two benches vacated this week by the dearly
departed Malenkai and Balsamic Dragon?  Questions, questions, so many
questions?  The entire game remains a riddle, as does its potential
outcome.  With so many loose ends, there's so much still to play for.  So
if you want to get involved, give the Barkeep a holler - but be quick.
With only two spare benches, they're certain not to last for long.
Grab a Donkey
Grab-a-Donkey results for round 5 saw minimal change, with only some
timing constraints preventing the one possible donkey grab of the round
from succeeding.  Instead, Calvin n Hobbes ended up with the Little Lamb,
but at least e got a Wool Sweater out of it.  breadbox and Slakko remain
vigilant, breadbox with apparently less reason to do so given previous
strategies.  When our Wrangler returns from vacation, the round 6 results
have been promised to set you abuzz.  So listen out and keep working on
that lasso action.
Single Capture Go
The first Single Capture Go non-Duel game started this week, but
unfortunately apathy saw only three players start the game.  The Gingham
Wearer looks to be in trouble already, having lost two of eir liberties to
Alfvaen and Wild Card.  Wild Card appears to have the better board
position at the moment, with more of the board away from emself.  But all
it takes to lose is a single captured stone, so watch yourself carefully,
players.
Word Un-Association 
This game appears to be in an effective playtest first game.  Some
problems with the rules have been spotted - we only hope that they can be
fixed up before it continues too much longer.  Slakko's ineptness with
piano didn't help him, though, as /dev/joe and the player formerly known
as Slagothor (whose current name we cannot mention for legal reasons :-))
strolled to a link word with walk.  Hopefully /dev/joe can come up with
something a little less link-worthy.

Advertisements
The Infrequent Ackan will soon be bringing you an exclusive interview with
Acka's own Poet Laureate. Listen to breadbox as e tells you about eir life
both in and out of the public eye. The Infrequent Ackan - bringing you the
celebrities you want in the interviews you asked for.

The Infrequent Ackan, first to you with Ackan news.
Copyright  Duncan Richer writing under the pseudonym of "Slakko", 28/2/98.
Check us out on the web, at
http://dcr24.quns.cam.ac.uk/Nomic/Acka/infrequent.html 

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End of ackanomic digest V3 #42
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