Subject: ackanomic digest V2 #367
From: [email-masked] (ackanomic digest)
To: [email-masked]

ackanomic digest      Saturday, November 15 1997      Volume 02 : Number 367

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Date: Sat, 15 Nov 1997 12:38:00 -0800
From: Alexandre Muniz <[email-masked]>
Subject: Acka: Dances with Phoebe

It was an unseasonably warm day, and I distractedly fell into a reverie 
staring at my cave fish Justinian's kettle while I was working on a my 
long-neglected plans for the Map of Ackanomic. Just then, a parrot flew 
through an open window and landed on the table in front of me. It was 
carrying a small red and blue matchbox, and had something tied around 
its leg. A tiny silver speck emerged from the box. I blinked.
"Phoebe! It's so good to see you. Is this one of the expedition's 
parrots? I don't recognize it."
"Beats me. It said it was on its way here, so I hitched a ride. Listen 
two-star, I'm worried. I think I'm in trouble."
"Is it the Orange Menace again?"
Phoebe sighed. "Worse. It's Malenkai. He wants me repealed."
I was shocked. Despite his involvement in the Vulcan coup, Malenkai was 
generally considered a highly respected citizen of Acka. "Why?"
"I don't know. He was nice enough before, but something has changed."
The parrot hopped impatiently. I looked at its leg, and noticed that 
what I had taken for a string tied around it was actually a tiny rolled 
up bit of paper. I untied it and laid it flat on the table. It read:

"Beware. Saboteurs from the Patch are attempting to destroy the amber 
banana tree. Come, and it shall be explained."

First Phoebe, and now the Amber Banana Tree. This was dire news indeed! 
"This must be a ruse perpetrated by dark forces working in conjuction 
with the Evil Overlords of Ackanomic (retired). Who could credit an 
Agent of Orange with such a propensity for defoliation?"
"Not so fast, two," Phoebe chirped. "Our Vulcan friends are cleverer 
than that. Their methods are not so crude. But it certainly appears that 
*someone* is trying to make contact with you."
I thought quickly. "The Life cycle of the Amber Banana Tree is described 
in the Codex of Kra. And translated passages of the Codex of Kra are 
kept in the Library. Maybe if we go there we'll meet the person who sent 
me the message."

As I walked over to the library with phoebe on my shoulder I felt that I
was being followed but I could only catch the briefest glimpse of
someone behind me. We found the codex translation in the natural science
room.
"The codex. I've always wanted to have a look at the original. Imagine 
all of the lost knowledge in there, waiting to be translated-- the 
hidden secrets of the Monolith, the moons of Acka, the chiral properties 
of grapefruit, the infamous, if short-lived antigumball, all waiting to 
be unlocked."
"There won't be anything about anti-gumball in there. The Jaran 
scientists who produced the Codex died in the cataclysm produced when 
one of them chewed the original anti-gumball."
"What happened?"
"Hubris. They thought they could use the anti-gumball to create
limitless 
power. But it was too unstable, and the entire city was destroyed. Jara. 
That's it!" Phoebe smacked her forehead. ("plink") "When Malenkai 
discovered the Map of Jara, he buried it to keep it safe. Now that is
has been unearthed he must fear that there is something in that map,
something that I, with my ancient knwledge might remember...
"But then we're already too late. The map is in the Vulcan /dev/joe's
hands now. "
"Well, I may not know what's on that map, but I think I know where I can
find out. There's a particularly imfamous book in here somewhere that
I'm pretty sure has the answer.
"You don't mean *that* book. The last time-- The horror! The horror!"
"Relax two. I'll read it. You just have to take me over there."
Just then a shadowy figure emerged from the stacks.
"You may call me Mr. W."
"Let's go," said Pheobe, "We have no time to waste."
I raced out of the room, carrying Phoebe. Behind us, Mr. W. cried, "You
don't understand. You're my tool! You can't handle the truth! Wait!
Don't Go!"
I walk through the library as quickly as I could without raising
attention, then hesitated at the entrance to the Vault of the Book. 
"Problem, Phoebe. If I go in there, I'll immediately be forced to read 
the page that it is open to. How can we get you to the right page in the
book?"
"Do you have my matchbox?"
I nodded. We arranged to have me throw the matchbox on the table with
the book, whereupon she would, with the help of her ant companions in
the box, open the Ackanomicon to the correct page. But as I opened the
door to the vault, my eyes were inexorably drawn to the tome...

to be continued...

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Date: Sat, 15 Nov 1997 12:46:40 -0800
From: Alexandre Muniz <[email-masked]>
Subject: Acka: Nomicon

I am going to the library, to the vault of the book, to take a peek at
the Ackanomicon. (In case you didn't catch it.)

**two-star

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End of ackanomic digest V2 #367
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