Subject: Ackanomic Digest V1 #285
From: [email-masked] (Ackanomic Digest)
To: ackanomic-digest

Ackanomic Digest      Thursday, October 10 1996      Volume 01 : Number 285

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Date: Thu, 10 Oct 1996 00:57:12 +0200 (EET)
From: Uri Bruck <[email-masked]>
Subject: acka: Presidential Elections - the geometry of Ackanomic

All things, either they exist or they do not exist, any thing that exists
is deemed to exist by having substance and essence, and any thing that is
must have form, the substance being the form of the essence. A thing which
does not exist, can be deemed not to exist either by lack of essence, or
by lack of form which implies the lack of substance which, being the form
of essence, cannot be the form of a non-essence, in which case it is the
substance of nothing and cannot exist, and conversely, an essence which
does not have form, lacks substance, and therefore can also not be said to
exist. 
All things that are known to exist have both essence and substance,
the latter being the form of the former. However, there may exist things
which are not yet known, or have been known and are no longer known, yet
they exist, even if the essence is not known and cannot be called by name,
or the substance is unrecognizable and its essence cannot be discovered by
mere observation and comparision to any of the known essences. 
An undiscovered cannot be known by a name, since it is yet undiscovered,
yet it must have a name, even if it is not known, for without a name one
either cannot describe without producing the essence itself whenever one
wishes to share one's discovery of an as-yet undiscovered essence, thus
it has an essential name. When such a new thing is discovered its name is
not always clear to the discoverer who names it by a name of eir own
devising, that being the substantial name, butno until the substantial
name is an acceptable approximation of the essential name, can the
discoverer, or any other seeker, manipulate the thing in any useful
manner, for it is in the essential name that one calls the essence.

[a couple of hundred pages snipped for brevity - although further excerpts
may be published in the future]

From that follows that Ackanomic has both substance and essence, and that
Ackanomic be both its essential name and its substantial name, from which
follows that it must have form, for otherwise it would not have existed,
and surely it does, so a form it must have, and the description of the
form is what we call shape, from which follows further that acka does
indeed have a shape, as defined in the Geometries described in chapter the
fifth above, and that fact is a uncontestable by any logical means
whatsoever, as it was arrived at by pure reason and logic.

Niccolo Flychuck

Presidential candidate

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Date: Thu, 10 Oct 1996 01:07:50 +0200 (EET)
From: Uri Bruck <[email-masked]>
Subject: acka: Presidential Elections - addendum

The text I've just posted is from an ancient text I recently discovered in
my cellars. It is written in what appears to be a proto-Vulcan dialect,
and I am currently in the processs of translating it. 
There many parts I am still struggling with, however, I have managed to
translate, with what I believe to be a high degree of accuracy a couple of
passages, and those I posted there. 

Niccolo Flychuck

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Date: Wed, 9 Oct 1996 18:20:26 +0000
From: [email-masked]
Subject: Re: Acka: Perhaps The Most Important Message You'll Read All Ye

> 
> I trade another rock for a forehead of great class and distinction.  It's
> owner has obviously not just learned the tricks of the trade, but instead
> learned the trade.  A small gold plate on the forehead declares that "This
> forehead was donated by snowgod, a swell guy!"  I transfer this forehead to
> Techno.
> 

I accept this forehead.  Thanks snowgod.
"Don't learn the tricks of the trade, learn the trade."

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Date: Thu, 10 Oct 1996 00:22:04 +0000
From: Bascule <[email-masked]>
Subject: Re: Acka: President, etc.

> I admit that a Gaol cells need not be two dimensional to be stacked.
> 
> Thanks for all the interesting responses.  Since you all seem well
> equipped to answer questions, while all I have to do is ask them, could
> the Brass Monkey have some motion that would allow it to cover an infinite
> distance in a finite time?  What if it climbed each constant-sized cell
> twice as fast (i.e., in half the time) as the previous one? Isn't this
> analogous to the infinite goemetric series Gaol covering a finite area?
> 
> -mr cwm

No, I don't think so. The Brass Monkey will still only cover a finite 
number of cells, namely

n = (2^x)-1

where x is the number of of climbing steps (when x=1, n=1; x=2, n=3; 
x=3, n=7 etc). n will be infinite only if x is infinite. The Brass 
Monkey will have to climb infinitely fast if it wants to climb to the 
top of an infinitely tall building, assuming such a building has a 
top to climb to. 

Incidentally, R 824 says " the Brass Monkey shall climb the tallest
building in Acka Land..." - note that it doesn't explicitly say that
the Brass Monkey must reach the top. Maybe it would get away with
just climbing halfway up an infinite building :)

Bascule

 

 

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Date: Wed, 09 Oct 1996 20:11:59 -0400
From: Malenkai <[email-masked]>
Subject: Acka: Financial

I am helping ThinMan with the finances this bond cycle.

What follows are the bond yields at the end of the last cycle, and
the payoff per player, based on their holdings at that time.

All the account balances are on my player entity page, and are up
to date with these, salaries, and all other transactions, and all
bond holdings should be correct.  A log is available, but it is not
easy to read.  If you do not have web access, e-mail me and I will 
tell you your balance.

Any errors should be minor.  I do not believe there are any errors, but
who knows.

If you need to know the amount of A$ in circulation, treasury, etc,
feel free to use R 115 and calculate these values yourself :)  That
motor inn in R 1046 has A$30.

snowgod and Guy Fawkes both have less than A$100, so they should watch
tools votes and other bribing.

Malenkai
- ------------------------------------------------------------------------
Bond yields as of sept 30, amounts in A$ per bond:

PFHabeous  .50
PFBrinjal  .42
PFGuy      .41
PFsnowgod  .40
PFfnord    .39
PFMalenkai .37
PFUncle    .36
PFdev      .35
PFmr       .31
PFNiccolo  .31
PFWayne    .30
PFThinMan  .29
PFBash     .27
PFBascule  .24
PFbreadbox .18
PFTechno   .18
PFRobin    .14
PFIdiotBoy .01

No other bonds yielded any dividends or debt.

Payoff per player, based on holdings on sept 30:

Bascule: A$24
breadbox: A$18
Brinjal: A$42
CnH: A$0
Dagny: A$0
/dev/joe: A$35
fnord: A$39
fon: A$0
Guy Fawkes: 30.75 + 15 + 9.3 + 10.8 + 10 = 75.85 = A$76
Habeous Corpus: A$35
IdiotBoy: .3 + 2.9 + 4 = 7.2 = A$8
Malenkai: 29.6 + 1.8 + .8 = 32.2 = A$33
Mohammed: 0 + 8 = A$8
mr cwm: A$31
Niccolo: 15.5 + .2 + 4.5 + 5.4 = 25.6 = A$26
Pascal: A$0
PapaSmurph: A$0
Robert Sevin: A$0
snowgod: 7.2 + 10.25 + 1.8 + 0 = 19.25 = A$20
Techno: 9.9 + .5 + 10 + 6.2 + 3.7 = 30.3 = A$31
ThinMan: 26.1 + 3.7 = 29.8 = A$30
tinan: A$0
Uncle Sam: 5.4 = A$6
Wayne: 30 + 14.4 = 44.4 = A$45

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Date: Wed, 9 Oct 1996 19:32:17 -0500 (CDT)
From: Guy Fawkes <[email-masked]>
Subject: Acka: offer

The Really Big Blue Thing That Doesn't Do Too Much, Really, has served 
the purpose I intended for it, and I am ready for Bascule to purchase it 
back from me for A$375, pending his ack.

Guy Fawkes

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Date: Thu, 10 Oct 1996 01:40:35 +0000
From: Bascule <[email-masked]>
Subject: Re: Acka: offer

> The Really Big Blue Thing That Doesn't Do Too Much, Really, has served 
> the purpose I intended for it, and I am ready for Bascule to purchase it 
> back from me for A$375, pending his ack.
> 
> Guy Fawkes

I ack this. 

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Date: Wed, 9 Oct 1996 17:39:39 -0800 (AKDT)
From: "Phillip R. Ackley" <[email-masked]>
Subject: Acka: Official

I, snowgod, have commisioned two poems from the Poet Laureate.  I have 
been qouated a fee of A$30, which I agree to pay.  These poems must be 
completed by 10/10/96.

Thank you for your time,
snowgod

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Date: Wed, 9 Oct 1996 21:28:47 +0000
From: [email-masked]
Subject: Acka: Forehead

It is with great pride that I put on my recently donated forehead.  
I loudly proclaim "SNOWGOD IS A SWELL GUY!!!

Techno

snowgod for president.

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Date: Wed, 9 Oct 1996 21:15:21 -0500
From: T Joffrain <[email-masked]>
Subject: Re: Acka: President, etc. 

>Thanks for all the interesting responses.  Since you all seem well
>equipped to answer questions, while all I have to do is ask them, could
>the Brass Monkey have some motion that would allow it to cover an infinite
>distance in a finite time?  What if it climbed each constant-sized cell
>twice as fast (i.e., in half the time) as the previous one? Isn't this
>analogous to the infinite goemetric series Gaol covering a finite area?

No infinite area can be covered (in the sense you mean) in a finite time.

However... it could be covered in another way.
Supposing the brass monkey was to have a relativistic velocity (or simply :)
exactly the speed of light [insert laugh here]) then our monkey would have
infinite mass (theoretically) and this would imply occupying every space of
the universe (infinite mass requiring infinite space of storage). Therefore
it could be argued that the monkey "covers" all points in the universe,
including the height of the infinite tower.

But that's mixing relativistic laws with our non relativistic experience of
it. It may be that once the monkey reaches its infinite mass, it's still
localized (more likely). But then infinite mass does mean infinite
gravitational force (at least till Pxxx passes...) and thus the entire
universe (including the infinite goal) would "fold" back onto the monkey and
become one single point of infinitely large density. Read: _very_ small point.

Right before a new Big Bang takes place, it would be reasonable to assume
that once again, the monkey does cover every point in the universe,
considering all of it has become one point.

Let me just say, though, that If the monkey, with a known non zero mass did
reach the speed of light, the only thing I'd bet my life on is the fact that
I would not want to be in the same universe at that time (yes, assuming time
to be constant and would not itself fold, making the process itself take an
infinite amount of time).

If I may continue rambling on (apologies for wasting bandwidth) I believe a
more elegant approach would be as someone suggested, using a fractal.

Fractals have infinite perimeter length (turns and twists to infinity).
Therefore, the goaler could have a map, complete with cool colours, of our
fractal prison. The goaler would be able to zoom in to any point of the
fractal location he desires, finally select a point on the perimeter and
click. That would be the cell for the prisoner. Finding the cell again
(oops) would require only remembering the location of the cell as plotted
into the equation and its coordinate system (usually with range as the
imaginary set). Then, possible after just a few tries (suspense), the
prisoner's cell could again be found and activated.

I'm saying activated, because the points on the perimeter would be tiny
(_really_ tiny). I am assuming clicking on the map has some kind of property
which opens a gate (mathematical black hole perhaps?) to the actual cell
where the prisoner can be kept with some comfort, rather than in a cell of
infinitly small dimensions which would result in bad cramps and lawsuits.

CnH

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Date: Wed, 9 Oct 1996 22:04:18 -0500
From: T Joffrain <[email-masked]>
Subject: Acka: Gumball? 

Realizing this may be completely out of date...

_If_ the gumball exists _and_ no other player has said this before me today:

I chew the gumball. It's kind of hard, not having been chewed on for a
while, but good, with a cool minty fresh taste.

Calvin "chewing" Hobbes

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Date: Wed, 09 Oct 1996 23:15:07 EDT 
From: [email-masked]
Subject: Acka: Heresy

Unfortunately,  I only posted the Proposal to repeal Enlightenment on
Monday.  It is now Wednsday.  The Witchhunt will end on Friday,  a good
three days too soon.

Habeous Corpus
contemplating infinity in a finite space

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Date: Wed, 09 Oct 1996 23:15:07 EDT 
From: [email-masked]
Subject: Acka: Presidential

Thanks for clearing up my confusion concerning your lovely Prosthetic
forehead.  If my Proposal to end forehead discrimination passes,  I will
wear it proudly,  even though it will be after the election.

I ack the creation of Niccolo Flychucks sticker and once again use it to
cover my donkey,  keeping its tail from swishing constantly in my
monitor.

Habeous Corpus
covering emself

------------------------------

Date: Wed, 09 Oct 1996 23:15:07 EDT 
From: [email-masked]
Subject: Acka: Re: infinity

On Wed, 9 Oct 1996 17:31:23 -0500 (CDT)
Mohammed <[email-masked]>
wrote:
>
>> I will refrain from calling a witchhunt on this occasion, wishing 
>all 
>> peoples of all religions to return to the orthodoxy that the earth 
>is 
>> indeed a geometric plane, the only figure flat in every meaning of 
>the 
>> word (not to mention the only flat figure permitting a Gaol with 
>> infinitely many finite cells).
>	Actually, a Gaol with infinitely many finite cells can be
>contained in finite 3-d space, but not if all the cells are the same 
>size. 
>Simply declare that each cell is half the width of the one to its 
>left, and
>that the leftmost cell is 5x10x8 feet.
>	Since Ack may have to fit in a sphere, depending on the 
>pass/fail 
>of mr cwm's recent proposal, this may end up being the common 
>interpretation...
>
>- --Mohammed
>
Just because (or in spite of) the fact that the earth is flat,  does
Ackanomia have to exist in a three dimensional space?  If mr cwm can have
a pewter klein bottle next to a kitchen sink,  I think there is room(sic)
for multidimensional stacking that never disturbs the outward form or
size.

Habeous Corpus
too tired to make any more atgument

------------------------------

Date: Thu, 10 Oct 1996 00:48:26 -0400
From: Malenkai <[email-masked]>
Subject: Acka: NAP Swinger

I am appointing Mohammed to the office of Acting NAP Swinger.  He seemed
interested in party chess.

I have also submitted a proposal to clean up the wording at the bottom
of R 726, which I personally found confusing, and which I don't think 
will hold sway over R 457 in all cases, that precedence claim
notwithstanding.

Malenkai
Speaker

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End of Ackanomic Digest V1 #285
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