Subject: acka-finance-digest V3 #65
From: [email-masked] (acka-finance-digest)
To: [email-masked]

acka-finance-digest      Saturday, April 25 1998      Volume 03 : Number 065

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Date: Sat, 25 Apr 1998 23:27:38 -0400 (EDT)
From: Towsner <[email-masked]>
Subject: Acka: Ackan Reserve Financial Report

Daily News:
	In an unanticipated jump, the activity index uncreased by almost
150%.  To complement this unprecidented growth, the positivity value rose
by exactly 10 points.  The combined growth of almost 36% is by far the
largest gain ever, both in absolute and percentage terms.  The market
itself crosses 100 today, leading the Reserve to add another clause at the
last minute to its reform proposal.  Says the CFO of Shell#3 Mutual Funds,
"Correction, former CFO.  With all this money, I'm retiring."

Rules and Regulations:
	In light of what the staff of the Ackan Reserve have deemed the
"Monty Haul Crisis," the Ackan Reserve is officially requesting that all
Ackans support the current proposals which would add an Ackanomicon page to
reduce the market as well as Slakko's reform proposal.  According to Ackan
Reserve Chair if, an additional reform proposal which would add two more
player members to the Reserve's Executive Board to reduce the positivity
value will be officially made tomorrow.  In light of today's events, the
Reserve is planning to add a "payoff" clause, which will allow the Reserve
to pay out a portion of the stock value and reduce it accordingly.  The
Reserve hopes that this will keep stocks affordable and prevent them from
being monopolized by the wealthy.  Ackan citizens are requested to support
all three proposals, which the reserve hopes will finally put an end to the
crisis.

Stock Market Information:

Assuming no futher announcements today, the following information will take
affect at 12:12 tomorrow:

	Current Value: 102.1
	Positivity Value:73.1
	Activity Value: 29.0

	Change Today +27.0
	Change in Positivity: +10.0
	Change in Activity: +17.0

	Activities Today: 17

- --
The Ackan Reserve Financial Report
Published by the board of the Ackan Reserve
Coming daily since 1998

	else...if

		ELSE...IF

	Chair, Ackan Reserve

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End of acka-finance-digest V3 #65
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