ackanomic Digest Thursday, April 08 1999 Volume: 04 Issue: 095 ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Duncan Richer Subject: Acka: Ackapologies Date: Thu, 08 Apr 1999 03:31:50 -0400 (EDT) I really need to spend some time updating the webpages. I haven't had that time lately, and I may not have any time to do it until the weekend. I was away over Easter, and this caused the problem. Apologies for any inconvenience caused. Yours, Slakko tardy Web-Master. -- Duncan C. Richer aka Slakko the Lost Warner Brother | Queens' College http://www.dpmms.cam.ac.uk/~dcr24/ Ackanomic | U. of Cambridge ------------------------------ From: Towsner Subject: Acka: Nothing to fear but Ackanomic Date: Thu, 08 Apr 1999 16:31:31 -0400 (EDT) A message from your Scaremonger, to the tune of "The Ballad of Sweeny Todd": Attend the tale of number oh. We should have abandoned it long ago. No other number could survive When by zero it was multiplied. Although it had nothing to add, It's tale is sad: The demon number of Acka. It tried to reach out to others too: Not what a number ought to do. Finally it became a third, By 3 to 3, a vote absurd, From else, From foolish else, The Evil Math Troll of Acka. Cut those numbers down, zero, Make them all like you! If one-third equals zero, Two-thirds does too! In adding it was just a blank: Nothing would grow, but nothing shrank. Subtracting too was just the same: It had no value to its name Its value was infinitesimal, 'Twas really null. The demon number of Acka. Inconspicuous zero was, Almost nonexistant it was. Amost a circle, perfect ellipse All other numbers zero would eclipse. Zero plotted and zero planned, Like the number it was it planned. Zero's revenge was not denied, We all know what happens when zero divides: Zero was smooth, zero was clever, Zero would be the only number ever: Inconspicous zero was, Quick and quiet a plan it was, A truly evil number it was, Was zero, Zero! Zero! Zeeeeeerooooooo! Attend the tale of number oh, It did what it should have done long ago. All the others have been multiplied, They've srunk inside To zero, To number oh, The demon number of Acka. -- -Henry Towsner Thank heavens, the sun has gone in, and I don't have to go out and enjoy it. -Logan Pearsall Smith ------------------------------ Subject: Acka: *ping* From: Joseph DeVincentis Date: Thu, 08 Apr 1999 18:47:04 -0400 (EDT) Today is Thursday, the 8th day of April, and the Machine That Goes *ping* Has Gone *ping* today. Since I have been scholar, the Machine has gone *ping* 9 times. /dev/joe Scholar of *ping* ------------------------------ End of ackanomic Digest V4 #95 ******************************