Citizens of Ackanomic,

Kolot Ackanomic Premiere issue is here. 
For this special 1st issue, which is published on a date of a Party-Hall
Party, Kolot presents eir new readers with this ballad written by Guy
Fawkes.

Earlier today, the Vulcan Swinger, who also doubles as Chess-Umpire, was
seen dancing around in Party-Hall singing this very ballad. Every now and
then he would dance over to the PartyBoard and examine the board position,
undoubtedly considering eir next move, only to start singing again a few
moments later, with traditional musical accompaniment that didn't appear
to originate anywhere in particular.

-----------------------------------------------------

		The Ballad of Party Chess

There is a board in Party Hall; sing rickety-tickety-tin.
There is a board in Party Hall, and on it armies rise and fall.
'Tis a miracle 'tis used at all --
For the game that could never begin, begin
For the game that could never begin.

Sir Flychuck sent an RFC; sing rickety-tickety-tin.
Sir Flychuck sent an RFC, 'twas analyzed quite heatedly,
And then he passed proposals three--
But to think that was all is a sin, a sin
To think that was all is a sin.

For on a trip he went away; sing rickety-tickety-tin.
For on a trip he went away, and then again returned one day.
To find a game he could not play--
For the rules had passed without men, no men
The rules had passed without men.

The men were made, and that was great; sing, rickety-tickety-tin.
The men were made, and that was great, but still the game was stalemate,
For no one wished to moderate--
And the rules needed written again, again
The rules needed written again.

These rules, to some, seem'd paradox'd; sing rickety-tickety-tin.
These rules, to some, seem'd paradox'd, and to them jurisprents flocked, 
All Party Chess's chances rocked--
All seeking a paradox win, a win
All seeking a paradox win.

The paradoxen were unmade; sing rickety-tickety-tin.
The paradoxen were unmade, but then Malenkai CFJ'd;
The court said, "It cannot be played--
Go rewrite the rules again, again
Go rewrtie the rules again

The rules were fixed, or so thought we; sing rickety-tickety-tin.
The rules were fixed, or so thought we, but then came Swing'rs and Gravity,
So crazy did the whole thing be--
You would think we were all frinking gin, yes gin
You would think we were all frinking gin.

And now the game's on solid ground; sing rickety-tickety-tin.
And now the game's on solid ground, and now new pieces do abound,
And so we say don't stand around--
Oh, become a Swinger; join in, join in
Yes, become a Swinger; join in.

And if you do not like my song; sing rickety-tickety-tin.
And if you do not like my song, you yourself are in the wrong,
You've yourself to blame if it's too long--
You should never have let me begin, begin
You should never have let me begin.