Volume 1, Issue 5

January 6, 1998

In this issue:

1. Editorial

2. Latest Ackanomic News

3. The Party Chess Page

4. Sub Game Pot Pourri

 Editorial

Welcome to the New Year.

As always, Acka continues to delight us and surprise us with changes to its ever-interesting tapestry. Heck, who am I kidding? Still, enjoy the paper.

Slakko
Editor, The Infrequent Ackan

 

 

 

 

 

Latest Ackanomic News

By Slakko
Deuce Reporter, Infrequent Ackan

Thanks to a large number of vacationers, not a lot has happened in Acka the past couple of weeks. However, rumours have abounded of the arrival of a new and mysterious figure. One who hides in shadows to fight those who lurk there. As yet there is only rumour, we have yet to see em in action, but hopefully it will not be long before the appearance of: The Caped Crusader!

Yes, the Caped Crusader, fighter of crime, doer of good deeds, rides through Acka! As yet the CFCJs have yet to flow, but I am sure that our reported crime figures will balloon, as more and more crimes are exposed. Perhaps the Caped Crusader will even be able to shed some light on the heinous crime of Zuriti'ili, which to this day remains hidden and festering in a pool of hatred.

 

Along with the Caped Crusader comes, as you are all now well aware, a sidekick, at this stage provisionally named the Boy Wonder. Tryouts for the role will no doubt be occurring very soon, so keep your eyes peeled for a rash of fake capes, stupid looking masks, and cheesy merchandising.

In the rumour mill, things are quiet. This is always a disheartening sign, for it indicates that something is afoot, but we're yet to be let in on it. The Evil Overlords are relatively quiet, but then so is the Rebellion. From where could this rumour have surfaced? Only time will tell.

On a happier note, a new citizen stumbled into Ackanomic yesterday. E said eir name was Goldenmean, a name most pleasing to Ackan ears to hear. E was feted with the trappings of A$900, a kaa of land and eir own house, albeit a house in a currently indescribable (or undescribed) state, and told that all this would be eirs to have permanently, once e became a truly active member of the community.

 

 

 

The Party Chess Page

By Niccolo Flychuck
Expert in Party Chess

This Week: A Horse, A Horse, My Kingdom for a Horse!

 Or as Vulcan Swinger /dev/joe recently put it: "So many pieces and not the one I want." This exclamation was followed by the purchase of a Cantor placed next to a pawn moved on that same turn from its spot besides a Spam Cantor. Was the Cantor the piece /dev/joe wanted? This commentator thinks not! In the current position, the pawn can take advantage of the nearby Cantor to reach a Promotion square on Vulcan's next turn. Readers of the Infrequent Ackan may recall that just several weeks ago, this same commentator, in a response to an Infrequent column, suggested that we might be seeing some pawn activity soon, and indeed we are.

Most recent plays involved the Movement and Placement of pawns, the NAP Swinger even placed a pawn right in the path of a Nabi that had been placed just before. Had it not been for Vulcan's brilliant use of Cantors to advance eir pawn in just two Turns from the Outer Ring to the Center, we might have had to wait longer to see the drama unfold, but as things stand Vulcan has an obvious pawn lead, which may well result in the beginning of a battle for the control of the Center.

The MetaMorph Swinger is just out of range of the Center and is in no position to interfere with Vulcan's plans, although the same proximity marks em as being the most likely to suffer immediate consequences, the only thing that stands now between Vulcan and a Pawn Promotion - a first in this game, is Capital Swinger's Flychuck's turn.

Flychuck's current pieces are nowhere near Center, but e may be able to employ some well placed drops in order to discourage a Vulcan Promotion. However, one should note that Vulcan has a strong presence near center. Vulcan's two Bishop's are both on even squares (in reality the PartyBoard is chequered this fact is not always evident in it web representation - so this commentator has taken to referring to squares instead by colors, by the parity of the sum of the ordinal of the letter coordinate and the number coordinate - it's equivalent to the color scheme of chess boards).

 

 

Normally one would prefer to have two like diagonally moving pieces on squares of different parities, however, the Vulcan Pawn, the one that's apparently intended for Promotion, is also on an even square, and trivially, the Promotion square it is aiming for is even as well.

This means that the two Bishops can provide a large safety net, and together with the nearby Rook, Vulcan is in a good position to start the battle for the Center from. Furthermore, Vulcan has a large material reserve, and even though the Vulcan Swinger has publicly stated that e is not happy with the choices of eir predecessor, this commentator guesses that if the stakes are high enough, e will employ them to enhance eir position.

It remains to be seen whether Flychuck will be able to thwart Vulcan's plans on eir own, or would it be necessary to employ some petty diplomacy, extended examples of which have not yet become evident. This also raises the question of whether Flychuck's recent Pass were a strategic Pass, calculated to preserve eir strength, or rather to conserve eir triple-Atomic Play privilege.

The battle for the Center has a potential to pick up in scale, as three other Swingers have started making for the Center with their own Pawns, all three approx. the same distance from the Center. MetaMorph is in a good position to provide support for what may be Flychuck's opposition to Vulcan, and is known to have strong off-board ties with him, so we may see some politics play a role here. Each of those three Swingers, Spam, MetaMorph, and NAP, can choose to lay back and wait for the drama to play itself out, or get involved now, lay down a path that their own Pawns could follow later.

Red Barn, the people's Swinger, may be slightly disadvantaged on this count, eir Mobility appears to have been compromised, this is reflected in the imbalance between the Material and Mobility components of eir Weight.

In short - the coming Turns are going to be very dramatic, I will not be surprised if during that time Party-Hall will be packed with Spectators, and my advice to all PartyChess enthusiasts - Watch the Center of the PartyBoard!

 

 

 

 

Sub Game Pot Pourri

Grab-a-Donkey finally ended this week, with Fortunato becoming the new champion. Donkey-grabbers everywhere are awaiting the new champion's suggested change to the rules.

Viruses Game 2 is up to round 4, with round 3 having resulted in a tie between Slakko and two-star for most cells infected. Round 4 looks to be a doozy.

Ye Olde Rusty Lantern is possibly heading for an end, and possibly heading for the courts. Dubious questions over the ending of the game have led to questions as to whether or not /dev/joe will have spun the tale of prophecy to its end.

 

Also continuing, reports of a new game of Mediocrity are sweeping the nation. A referee may well be available for this game, finally creating a game unlikely to collapse after three rounds due to apathy. This reporter looks forward to such an occurrence.

The Machine is still *ping*ing away, much to the Scholar's delight no doubt. One Magic Letter has been guessed, but I suspect from its cursory effect on the Truth that many people already surmised what the Letter revealed. The only question is, is "y" a vowel or a consonant for the purposes of Magic Letter Pricing?

Plea from The Editor

Do you have an idea for a column in the Infrequent Ackan? If you do, please email dcr24@cam.ac.uk ASAP and let me know your idea.


The Infrequent Ackan, first to you with Ackan news.

Copyright © Various Individual Authors, aka Slakko and Niccolo Flychuck, 6/1/98.

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